Fall in Love with Your Inner Self and Transform Your Outer Relationships For Good A 12 week online course to discover how to fall deeply and wildly in love with yourself first so that your relationships can be catalyzed into their evolutionary potential.

In our culture, the myth of the Soulmate runs strong – the Soulmate being that one person you long for, who will meet the requirements of your soul, your sex and your heart perfectly.

And yes, there is a soulmate for you. But Mr or Mrs Right is not out there. She/he is inside ... you!!

Inside every human being, regardless of our biology or sexual orientation, we have both masculine and feminine aspects. If one aspect is dominant in us, we unconsciously project the opposite out on others.

Our quest is that of the ancient Tantric masters: to get to know both our masculine and feminine aspects, and to bring them together in unity.

It is time for the True Lovers to meet themselves in your life, in a passionate embrace and endless discovery.

You know you want this. And now is the time. As you embrace and cultivate this inner love affair, your outer relationship life miraculously manifests this love.

It’s time to wake up and come back to yourself – to pull back your projections and expectations and take a good look inside.

You have all the answers you need internally.

The seed of this great love lives within you. You just have to know how to look. You have inside of you the seed of a great man, a deep woman – one who can grow to love beyond his/her needs and expectations, and live and awesome, sexy and majestic life.

Once we have truly returned to ourselves in great love, we can show up in partnership and open the doors to rapid mutual evolution, radical intimacy and cosmic sexuality.

We invite you to immerse yourself in 12 weeks of practicing principles and technologies that can radically transform your inner and outer relationship life.


  • Get to meet, own and pull back your projections of others
  • Meet the many faces and dimensions of your inner masculine and feminine
  • Learn how to face your unconscious relationship heros and villains in a fun and playful way
  • Discover how accurately men and women in your life mirror your inner relationship dynamics
  • Learn how to have powerful, real conversations between your inner masculine and feminine
  • Get expert guidance on how to overcome hurdles in the deepening of this love affair
  • Become grounded in how to take your sex life to the next level through doing the inner work

To bring that awesome, juicy lover into your life – you must fall in love with yourself first!

clive hayley colour

Join a movement of men and women dedicated to waking up your highest relationship potential.

Get to meet your inner Soulmate and evolve that relationship to its greatest current expression… so that your outer relationship can reflect that deep inner love affair that you now have in your life.

It’s worth it to dive in and do the work.


Artwork by Muhammed Salah



In this first module, we will give you a clear and layered understanding of what the Masculine and Feminine principles are and how they can enter into a rocking, juicy love affair with each other. We will explore the three levels of the masculine and feminine and how they exist in you. We will engage our own inner masculine and feminine aspects and perform a cosmic meditation connecting us to the universal love from above and below.




During this module, we will engage a powerful practice to pull back our projections from others allowing us to deeply connect with all aspects of ourselves. We will develop our witness capacity and learn to "stalk" ourselves in understanding our stereotypes, polarities and projections. We will discover how our unconscious gender beliefs get created through the conditioning passed down to us by our culture and family, giving us the power to step into our own creations. 

theatre square



In this module, we will perform a hilariously funny and revealing exercise in which we explore your internal gender caricatures. Caricatures are a personal version of stereotypes that live in our unconscious. These unconscious caricatures have a superb ability to undermine your relationship life - until they are seen and integrated. We will also practice a powerful and ancient Buddhist practice where we will develop what is known as the “Four Immeasureables”: sympathetic joy; loving kindness; compassion and equanimity.




During this module, we will explore the qualities of the Conscious Masculine and how they are currently developed in our lives. We will bring clarity and understanding to our current will and how it is possibly divided. We will engage a powerful practice to bring integration between our unconscious and conscious wills so that we are in line with our divine will.

meeting in heart



During this module, we will expand into the realm of the conscious feminine and explore the deep bliss that she offers. We will explore the realm of relationship and perform a profound practice where we get to meet and engage the state of relationship between our own inner aspects and gain insights into the dynamics of the external relationships in our lives and how they are reflecting the inner.

deep ocean



In this final module, we will learn the qualities of the deep or sacred masculine and feminine. We will explore principles for opening to this dimension in our inner and outer relationship life as well as engage plenty of somatic and experiential practices to drop into the deep compassion and love for ourselves in our totality. 


Carla Seattle

Carla Seattle

“I would say that the tools you gain in this course can be used intentionally for the rest of your life. I know I haven't exhausted them! I feel more confident about staying with my deepest heart and not compromising that. This is a course that will support growth, change and awareness in your personal life, but as importantly, in your spiritual life, and knowing the two as one in our global community. Whether you are in an intimate relationship with another person, or wanting change or support for community relationships or your connection with the Divine--dive in! I don't know how to describe the value--certainly far beyond the actual dollars I paid for the course. It is an invaluable course, quite intimate and deep a for long-distance course. I experienced the course participants whose voices I heard to be willing to explore very vulnerable material. I truly appreciate the honesty and openness of all that was shared."

Tarisha New Zealand

Tarisha New Zealand

"I was going through a painful separation and trying to make sense out of it. The course really helped me to discover what's true for me and harvest the lessons of that relationship. I'm at peace now and appreciate the gifts that relationship and breakup brought to me.  Seeing all my projections and stepping out of right/wrong dynamic. Accepting my polarities and stepping back into my centre. Letting go of my judgements of myself and others, deeper acceptance and friendship with myself."

Naomi United Kingdom

"This course is hands down the best online course I've ever done. Prior to this course, I had very little sense of my inner masculine, nor of the structure of the ego, made up of caricatures. This knowledge and the attitude of playfulness was very useful in relating to myself and to others. Thorugh the extraordinary awakening to my inner masculine, I found a sense of wholeness that I had never experienced before. I wholeheartedly recommend this course to those who have a desire to meet themselves and others from a place of expanded awareness and loving compassion."

Juliet Colorado

Juliet Colorado

"I would highly recommend this course to go on an inner discovery of meeting yourself in the most intimate way. How this meeting of yourself grows your capacity to meet another in present love. The value of this course has been life-transforming. I use what I have learnt in this course in every moment of my life."

Kathleen Ohio

"This course created a foundation within me upon which to build and helped me establish a richer relationship with my inner divine masculine and feminine that will last a lifetime and beyond. It has helped me see that I am more than my ego and shadow and has helped me connect with my inner beauty and love and accept myself more deeply. This is about doing deep inner work that is life-changing with the most important person in your life... yourself, and as a result, it affects all relationships. 

If you're just wanting to find a partner and focus on the external soulmate, this may not be for you. I connect more easily with my inner divine masculine and rely on that aspect to hold a space of presence and stillness for me. I feel more supported within myself. I more easily move into the divine feminine of being and receiving. As a result, I bring more of my true essence to relationships and connect more with others at the level of essence. Relationships are more connected and intimate as a result. I appreciated the sense of neutrality and nonjudgment from which the ego and shadow were approached. It helped me accept, appreciate and love the unlovable."

Clare South Africa

Clare South Africa

"I highly recommend this course for those who are looking to deepen their understanding of themselves and move and release that which no longer serves them, those things possibly hiding deep in the unconscious... This is a great space of discovery and learning to love all that is. For me, this course was a great space to bring me back into a valuable conversation that is shifting so much in me. I struggle to move through the work on my own, and so being a part of a community, and one that allowed me to connect no matter where I travelled in the world, was incredibly valuable for me."

Vanessa France

Vanessa France

"Before SMW began I thought I needed men to get to know the masculine energy. I was looking for a (male) teacher outside of me. I wasn't aware that I hold everything I need inside of me and that my discovery was only depending on my willingness to get to know myself better. The course helped me a lot to start shifting the way I relate with men and with my own personal power. It's still an ongoing process and I often reach back to the course materials where I found a lot of clues in situations that I experienced with men these last months."

Astrid South Africa

Astrid South Africa

"I bow to my inner wisdom for leading me to this course, and receive all its gifts with the deepest gratitude and appreciation.  I would invite anyone seeking a sense of fulfilment, or needing to answer a yearning and longing in their hearts for love and intimacy to do this course. Before the course I felt isolated from others - and although I had a deep desire to connect with people, I didn't know how to do that with ease. So I would pretend to be OK when interacting with others - pretend to be confident. Always present was a deep-down feeling of tension in myself. Since doing the course my social life has improved.  I'm able to meet with others with confidence and very little judgement about them or myself.  Because of the processes we used during SMW, I have cultivated much more compassion for myself and others - knowing we are all on a human journey meeting with the same/similar challenges. I am loving, kind, patient and gentle with myself in a way that I wasn't before the course - and by extension, I am becoming more so with others."

Lynette South Africa

Lynette South Africa

"Practical, engaging and delightful. I would recommend it as the best and most intimate gift to self. I was completely numb to my inner masculine and feminine and on automatic pilot.  Since this course I am more aware how my inner world reflects outwards."

Kelly Bali

Kelly Bali

"This course is about YOU, it's about true authentic connection intimacy and love, it sets up a foundation that impacts every area of your life - not just relationships. It's about raising your consciousness and evolving into who you truly are.

If you want to get to know who you really are - and meet your own soul.... this course will allow you to dive deep, so that you can open yourself fully to meet and experience the true soul mate relationship we all long for. It gives us the tools, freedom and power to embody all that we are and live from our true authentic essence.

Being online is such a gift as I travel a lot so no matter where I was I was able to access the wisdom of one of the most powerful trainings I've ever been a part of. Really allowing myself to be a mirror to whatever I experience from being triggered by someone has really allowed me to take 100 responsibility for everything and therefore have a deeper intimate relationship with myself & others."

Elisabeth Austria

Elisabeth Austria

"I would definitely recommend the course to understand the dynamics and unconscious pattern within us and project them on our partners in daily life. I got a deeper understanding of my inner masculine and feminine side, realized the wounds in the ancestral line of my feminine side and in a way it activated a new consciousnesses in my outer relationships and a deep growing process inside and outside. I see the value of SMW that you really can work with the material, even after the course you can repeat the exercises, watch the videos and read the materials to support your ongoing growing process in this theme."

Amie Ireland

Amie Ireland

"I really enjoyed taking the time to look deeply at various aspects of myself and learn to acknowledge them light heartedly so they lost their power over me. It really shifted my ability to be more open to my partner and it helped him soften and see me differently also. This changed our lovemaking significantly, we really started connecting and as a result, our relationship started to shift to a place of better understanding and compassion. I felt myself let go and let him love me and allow myself to love him deeply without holding back which I had been doing subconsciously for fear of him falling out of love with me one day.

I had always held onto an unheard/unseen frustrated child in me without realising. Through the various exercises and explorations, I found my inner woman and more specifically the mother in me. This, with the change in dynamic in our relationship I believe contributed to the wonderful surprise of me getting pregnant during the course! I believe something had shifted in me to allow it to happen."

Michelle Santa Barbara

"I feel like I have more tools now to explore both myself and my clients who are asking for greater understanding of themselves. The online, self-paced with live support format makes it accessible for anyone at any place in their process."

Claire Bay Area

Claire Bay Area

I heartily recommend this course because what you will learn about yourself through this process is nothing short of magical and miracle-generating! I've watched as I've increased in self-love and understanding that can be extended more easily to my Beloveds.  I also watch my own clients blossom before my eyes as I teach them what this work has taught me.”


  • 6 Teaching Modules in pdf written format, for those of you who prefer to learn through reading, and in audio format, for those of you who prefer to learn by listening. Teaching modules will be released every 2nd Friday from 17 January 2020.


  • A selection of practice and case-study videos to demonstrate some of the experiential practices from this course. 


  • A selection of guide-along audio meditations to support you to connect to both your divine masculine and divine feminine principles.


  • Access to our exclusive course community website to engage with your fellow students and share your discoveries. Being seen and heard in a wider group.


  • ★BONUS★: Access to the Soulmate Within Summit package, the recordings from a 4-day event hosted by Shakti Malan where she interviewed a variety of guest speakers where they explored different approaches to taking our inner and outer relationships to the next level. This package includes 18 audio interviews, a 3-part video series and 2 music downloads.


  • ★BONUS★: 4 Additional audio recordings, of audio workshops done with teachers and colleagues of Shakti Malan. Details of these are below.





Susannah and Ya’Acov Darling Khan are the founders of Movement Medicine and the Directors of The School of Movement Medicine. They have studied with healers and shamans from the Amazon to the Arctic Circle, including an 18-year apprenticeship with Gabrielle Roth.

After 30 years of not only living together but also running Movement Medicine together as a couple, Susannah and Ya’Acov reflect on the process that has resulted in their relationship being more vibrant now than ever. They share the key elements that have made all the difference in their relationship, and also talk openly about their journey of redefinition of what it means to be a man and a  woman. This wide ranging talk defines committed relationship as spiritual practice, in the much wider context of putting your all into making a contribution in this time of crisis and change.



Anaiya is a mystic, author and initiator of Sacred Marriage. Her books include: Womb Wisdom (Inner Traditions, 2011) Sacred Sexual Union (Inner Traditions, 2013), The Rose Knight (Lulu, 2014) and Sacred Relationship (Inner Traditions, 2016). Pete, Anaiya’s partner, cares passionately about his own and our reunion with our deepest truths, building ways for ourselves to live as and from that depth.

Anaiya and Pete discuss the invitation to journey into Sacred Marriage and to all the sacred warrior/midwives that carry this code. Sacred Marriage calls for every part of our being to this journey. This involves the complete transfiguration of our sexuality, not through repression or indulgence but through the ultimate refining fire of profound tenderness and worship on every level of the other. This also involves the complete opening of our sacred heart, the release of every trauma, every disappointment and every heartbreak.



Stuart Sovatsky, PhD, has a degree in Religion from Princeton University. A couples and spiritual emergence therapist and intensive kundalini yogi for 43 years, he is also the author of Advanced Spiritual Intimacy, Your Perfect Lips and Words from the Soul.

Infinite Appreciation is the reverse of those pesky “negative pattern arguments” that go on and on and defeat many wonderful lovers. For over 40 years, Stuart has shared Infinite Appreciation Communion with thousands of people worldwide, with hundreds of marriages saved from divorce over the decades by variations of this simple meditation by opening us to Oneness states of Giving and Receiving at a Soul level of endless love-play. “Where Man and Woman Revere* One Another is the play of the Divine” (Tantra Scriptures) * read: lovers of any sexual orientation.



Dr Azra Bertrand, MD and Seren Bertrand are founders of The Fountain of Life Grail Mystery School. As midwives of the Return of Womb Consciousness, they draw rich veins of wisdom from many traditions, and have assisted over 25,000 people to heal on a physical, emotional and spiritual level over 20 years.

There are 5 radical steps on the Path of Love – as practised in the ancient western mystery traditions – that invite us to ‘die to our old selves’, as we step through the doorway of the Dark Mother for a psychic rebirth. Our relationships are the epicentre of this revolutionary spiritual path. When we rebirth the way we relate with each other, emotionally, sexually and spiritually, we also rebirth the world. Old thinking sees our spiritual evolution as separate, disconnected, individuated – yet a new birthing portal is opening, which reveals that all of life is a wild relational web.


"In my 20’s and early 30’s, I tried a range of ways to find the fulfillment in relationship that I sensed was possible. I went for really safe, secure relationships and got bored. I fell for wild, uncontained lovers and got trapped in addictive cycles. I explored whether being with a woman would make a difference and found all the dynamics of relationship still present. I tried open relationship and polyamory. I took a position against relationship. None of these stances brought me any closer to that elusive fulfillment.

Finally, I saw clearly that happiness could not come to me through another – that I had to find the inner union, the Soulmate Within.

The radical nature of this moment brought me to some clear and powerful insights. I recognized that I was out of touch with the feminine, and committed to finding her. I recognized that for me, life would never be fulfilling through outer achievement only – but that my soul had a deep longing for spiritual awakening, and that this would be my path. Finally, I also saw clearly that happiness could not come to me through another – that I had to find the inner union, the Soulmate Within.

I discovered that each person I fell in love with was mirroring to me an aspect of myself that I hadn’t fully owned. All of them – each lover I ever had – was inviting me back to myself. To meet myself as the first beloved.

This work became my dedicated focus for several years. I remember clearly a moment of looking at myself in the mirror and feeling so in love with myself. I realized instantly that this had everything to do with the juicy love affair that had developed between my masculine and feminine."



"After being raised in quite a conservative, patriarchal religion I was taught that the ultimate goal in life was to be “happily married”, where you could be a pillar of society. Love and especially passion didn’t seem to be important factors in this requirement to be successful…. As ultimately it was more about duty...

So I was a “good girl” and dutifully got married at 22 and proceeded to have my first child.

However, I was miserable. I could sense that I had lost a crucial part of who I was.

I sought the help of a counsellor as my marriage was skirting the edge of dissolution and she asked me a simple question: Who is Tiffany?

I looked at her blankly and realized I didn’t know who I was.

I then ended my marriage and spent the next 10 years on a soul-searching mission to reclaim all of the lost parts of myself.

I discovered Shakti Malan in 2009, and she took me on the Soulmate Within journey where I started the process of discovering the various faces that made up “me” and created relationships where I could encounter and reclaim my un-owned projected pieces. 

This journey and process became my life's work… learning how to find deeply hidden aspects of my unconscious so that I could bring them into the light of my conscious awareness where I could love and embrace them.

This brought me to a place of radical responsibility, disowning nothing and embracing everything. Allowing myself to really enjoy the experience of true connection with the divine, and ultimately with myself…. Which after a time of finding and being fully me… I manifested an extraordinary partner who enjoys and plays with each of my aspects on a daily basis."




Register now by choosing either via monthly payments or a discounted once-off payment option.

This course is open to both men and women.


This course forms part of our longer TOTALITY THERAPY TRAINING and comprises one of the four modules required to complete this training and become a facilitator.  For those interested in participating for professional training reasons, this course covers the personal explorations component of your training. I.e. Giving you the opportunity to guide your clients from a place of lived experience and compassionate understanding rather than theory alone. Training for facilitating this work will take place in a later module forming part of the Totality Therapy Training.

This course is entirely suitable for individual and personal development motivations only.



  • Do I need a partner to do this work?

    No, this course is designed to be a personal journey, tapping into your own personal desires, blocks and personal connection with the Soulmate Within. For those who are in partnerships may find that this will bring a greater dimension to your relating and intimacy with one another. For those who do not have a current partner will find a great depth of relating to your own inner beloved as you step into who you truly are in a rich fulfillment within yourself – which in turn can open the pathways for relationship to open up.

  • When are the live group coaching calls?

    These calls will take on Wednesdays at 11am Pacific Time / 9pm South Africa / 7pm London / 6am Sydney* *(one day after). The dates of these calls are: 29 January, 19 February, 11 March, 8 April. They will be conducted via ZOOM video conference giving us the capacity to fully engage with one another. 

  • I can't attend coaching sessions live - what now?

    Not a problem – sessions are available within 24 hours so you can download them and listen to them at your own convenience.

  • Is this course for women only?

    No, this course is open to both men and women of all ages and all orientations.

  • How is the teaching conducted?

    The teaching content for each of the modules will be delivered in both a written pdf as well as an audio recording. These will be released every second Friday for the duration of the course. This allows you to immerse in the teachings at a time and place that is most convenient for you, giving you sufficient time to complete before each group coaching session.

  • Would this course work for me if I'm not straight?

    Absolutely. This course is ideally suited for people of all sexual orientations: gay, straight, trans, bi-sexual or whichever way your sexuality flows. This course is designed to open you to your unique inner masculine-feminine union so that you can step into who you truly are with utter acceptance and fulfillment.

  • Do I have to finish the course in a certain time period?

    No. Because you are able to download all the materials, you can work through them at your own pace. You will have access to the community website for one full year so that you can continue to interact and learn with the course participants even after you have completed your sessions. 

  • What about confidentiality?

    Your journey remains completely confidential. If you wish to share on the community website, there is a confidentiality agreement in place on the site.

  • Do I need good internet or internet skills to do this course?

    Only for downloading and interaction in the Q&A aspect of the sessions. We will give you all the support we can – and you’ll see that, once you’re in the flow, it’s really easy.  Because all of the materials are downloadable, you can always ask a friend to help you download everything from the internet.

  • Does the course require specific knowledge or experience?

    No. In fact, sometimes the less you know, the better it is – this opens you to beginner’s mind and to meeting the material in a fresh way.

  • Do you provide refunds?

    No, once registered you are fully responsible for completing your payments until the end of the payment term.