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Who Shaped Your Sexual Self-Image?

Sally grew up in rural England amongst people who appear from the outside to be excessively polite. This in contrast to the story Sally shares with me: Since she was a young girl, she was molested by her grandfather who was a primary carer in her life. Her grandfather in turn was molested by his father, who was molested by his father… and so the pattern goes back for generations. What each victim of sexual abuse had in common was that they were sworn to silence. All that happened was never spoken about – and silently passed on to the next generation.

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How to be a Skydancer

In the Tibetan Tantric tradition, a woman whose sexual energy is awake is called a Dakini – which, literally translated, means Skydancer. While traditionally the Dakini is worshipped as a deity, it is understood that the essence of the Dakini lives in every woman. She is activated through a process of spiritual realization, or returning to the discovery of her true nature.

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Why Feminine Appearance is Pure Trickery

It seems there comes a time in the lives of so many women when we realize we have lived more in our masculine than in our feminine. Unfortunately, many pin this realization on to appearance and put themselves through a torturous process of attempting to look more feminine. This is the point where women often come to me with the desire to learn how to be feminine – as if feminine essence is another skill we could master. Or women aggressively set forth on a mission to appear more feminine by changing their dress style, their body shape (with diet or surgery), their shoes and handbags, and even their tone of voice. In this way, we play into a trickery that will do everything BUT put us in touch with our feminine essence. In this article, I’d like to explain why.

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Run Towards Your Fear

In the last couple of months, through closely observing myself, I have come to see how much of my life – reflecting human life – is controlled by unacknowledged fear. I have come to believe that a very large percentage of our actions are motivated by this fear. The occasion that initiated this insight for me was one that most people would regard as unmistakably fear-inducing. I had received news that cancer had increased in my bones and I had been sent to get a CT scan to check whether the cancer had spread to my organs. In the few days before I got the CT scan results, my inner life became dominated with intense survival fear: What if the scans showed that my body was riddled with cancer? Have I come to the end of my life?

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Celebrating Post-Patriarchal, Post-Feminist and Post-Goddess Woman

The appearance of Woman’s Day has me reflecting,

Post-Patriarchal Woman

At this moment in history, we find ourselves as a species steadily leaving the familiar harbor of Patriarchy which we all – men and women alike – created through our agreement. However much we may want to put Patriarchy in the Bad Box, the last 5 000 years of patriarchal paradigm has brought enormous evolutionary leaps to human consciousness. Simply looking at advances in science and internet technology makes this obvious. And yet, it is also clear that Patriarchy has served its purpose.

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