Living a life where we hold the motto of “steadfastly follow your desire” can to some appear selfish or infantile. However, there is wisdom in this approach. This statement does not mean never compensate, don’t meet another person mid-way, be stubborn about what serves you no matter what, be completely hedonistic etc. 

It does, however, mean that there is an intelligence in being aware and following the threads of your desire. What is pulling and flirting with you? What is calling you to follow a path of greater ease, flow and freedom in your life?

Here are five reasons to embrace your desire:

1. It takes you to the resolution of the unconscious

Your erotic attractions and fantasies hold keys to what is locked away in the unconscious. The body, which is the unconscious in form, tells us about what is unresolved from our past through our erotic desires. These desires may be calling us to relive experiences that were not fully owned at the time, to move beyond false beliefs, or to feel feelings that we have suppressed.

2. It makes your desire a place of presence

If you can say yes to your desire, then desire itself can become a meditation. Our usual relationship with desire is one of hunger or repulsion. We run after what we desire, hoping that it will fill our emptiness and resolve our neediness. Or we run away from what we desire, hoping that this will spare us the pain of not getting what we want. 

Most of our lives are spent unconsciously running either away from or towards what we desire. If we can accept our desire for what it is, without wishing it away or groping for satisfaction, then desire itself can become a place of pure presence. Sit in the fire of this presence, and much will be revealed to you – and that will most likely not be what you thought.

3. It ignites the fire of your life force

Desire is what activates our vital life force. Without desire in life, we would be dead. If we stoke the fires of desire, this unleashes our raw chi, our dragon’s breath. Once the fire is burning, we can cool it down, and keep stoking it slowly, gently. 

The overall quality of fire in Tantric lovemaking is that of a cool, blue flame. But before there is the possibility of this cool flame, we first have to be willing to have the fires of our desire lit, and to have them burn deliciously

4. It confronts you with your taboos

Taboos are the places we hold as forbidden, mostly because of societal or cultural beliefs, and sometimes because of our personal belief systems. One of the first things a Tantric initiate would be asked to do in the ancient tradition would be to break their taboos. For Hindu meditators coming to the Tantric path, this would mean doing things such as eating meat, drinking alcohol or having intercourse with a stranger outside their caste.

Why were they required to break the sacred rules of their culture and religion? Because awakening asks of you to step even beyond those confines, to let go even of this form of safety – the rules of your culture or religion. The path of the seeker is one of aloneness. You can no longer rely on external rules imposed by your culture.

5. It speeds up the journey of your awakening

The full realization of who you are as soul, one with existence, will only happen when you have fulfilled and completed your human journey of desire. If core desires remain unfulfilled in your being, they will keep calling you back to the world of objects. Our aim in Totality Therapy is to be as total as possible with our experience, so we can accelerate the process towards full awakening.

If this journey calls to you and you have a desire to a greater knowing of yourself, then we invite you to join us on a 9-month Sexual Shadow Integration journey.  This program is unlike any other because the teachings and learnings it is based upon are enormously unique.  You can find out more information and register here.

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